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Welcome to my writing blog. Here you will find my latest stuff as well as books, short stories, essays, and poems written and published over the past forty years. Please note that all material is copyrighted  Gene Twaronite and The Twaronite Zone. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given with specific direction to the original content.

Doppelganger

Two years ago, I was sitting in a crowded rooftop bar in Manhattan (sigh) when the bartender leaned over to tell me I was her doppelganger. I had to quickly access my memory banks to make sure I had the right meaning. It’s not exactly a word I hear a lot, especially when it’s from a young woman referring to me. I dedicate this poem to her, in hopes she is well wherever she may be. You can read it here on page 5 of the latest issue of Tipton Poetry Journal, where it has just been published https://issuu.com/tiptonpoetryjournal/docs/tpj45

New Amazon Review of My Life as a Sperm (“Defies Classification”)

5.0 out of 5 stars. A Good Read All Around Reviewed in the United States on August 1, 2020 by Saber Blade. Verified Purchase

I approached this book with a great deal of anticipation and I was not disappointed. Besides loving the short essay form, there are about a bazillion other reasons for loving this book. It is fun– on quite a range of topics—from the author’s job working in a girls’ dorm (really) in college to answering the Big Questions: What is the nature of time, and can you get overtime? This book defies classification—and that’s an understatement. There are the college memories, the writer’s dedication to the environment based partly on his love for the outdoors and partly on his science expertise; several engaging autobiographical pieces including one in which Twaronite and his wife buy land in New Hampshire and set up a teaching nature reserve. For people who love this land and fear what’s happening to it, this undertaking hits a responsive chord. There are some nostalgia moments for those of us who grew up in mid-20th century America when children could actually play outdoors without supervision. An energetic opinion which imagines men and abortion.
If you’re looking for an antidote to almost everything in the news today then here’s a book with spot-on humor and serious exploration that will make you forget about all the awful media stuff we’re bombarded with these days.
The author doesn’t skirt opinions about hot political topics. If you don’t agree with his views about religion or abortion, read this book. It will expand your horizons and be good for your circulation. You might decide that it’s possible to chuckle– maybe even laugh, guffaw, or snicker–about opinions that too often divide people.
How can a book be seriously thoughtful and outrageously funny? Dig into the words of this gifted storyteller. You’ll probably remember all the words to Louie Louie

How to Eat Breakfast

I’m excited to announce my first picture book How to Eat Breakfast has just been published by Lyric Power Publishing, which offers “delightful children’s books designed to make learning about science fun.”

The book begins as her mother sets down a plate of pancakes for Wanda and says, “Now eat them while they’re still hot.” But Wanda would not. She just sat and stared at her feet dreaming of other ways to eat. So begins Wanda’s imaginary adventures in watching how animals eat.  

I am fortunate to have teamed up with talented illustrator Diane Ronning who brought my words to life on the page. Watch her video here to see a sample of her magic  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sJgLF9gbbpA
Our book is now available from Amazon   https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08CWJ8FNH?ref_=pe_3052080_397514860
Stay safe and be well, everyone.Cheers,

A Re-imagined America

As we celebrate this day of our national birth, let us re-imagine the country we claimed to be and the country we need to be. I can think of no better anthem to America than this poem “I, Too” by Langston Hughes. Let it ring out across the land!

I, too, sing America.

I am the darker brother.
They send me to eat in the kitchen
When company comes,
But I laugh,
And eat well,
And grow strong.

Tomorrow,
I’ll be at the table
When company comes.
Nobody’ll dare
Say to me,
“Eat in the kitchen,”
Then.

Besides,
They’ll see how beautiful I am
And be ashamed—

I, too, am America.

New Review of My Life as a Sperm

Reviewed By Jaycee Allen for Readers’ Favorite

Gene Twaronite’s My Life as a Sperm: Essays From the Absurd Side is part autobiography, part journalistic reporting, and part opinion. Some of these essays were previously published in magazines and literary reviews. Put together in this anthology, they nicely sum up a life rich with experiences that range from turning a forest into a private nature reserve, through the folly of youthful alcoholic indulgence in the company of the lovely Miss Maine, to presenting Kurt Vonnegut and facing a classroom of severely disturbed children without previous preparation. Also here are Twaronite’s excellent reasons for not having children, his early experience with religion, and his highly amusing discussion over how to choose a god from the many available. He also tackles the troubling problems that arose after his wife’s accident, how they both coped, and he gives us the confidence to face the same situation when it arises.

But it is, no doubt, Twaronite’s open-minded and humorous treatment of life that delights us most. Some might not agree with his point of view, his conclusions, his musical taste, or his building choices, and there might very well be people who might not like where his questioning mind takes them. But no one can deny either his logic or the pleasure to be had from reading the words of someone who refuses to march with the crowd. Twaronite’s writing style is easy and unpretentious; his irreverence and ability to laugh at himself are a treat and I couldn’t help wishing I could meet him, sit down and spend the afternoon in his company.

Gene Twaronite’s My Life as a Sperm: Essays From the Absurd Side is part autobiography, part journalistic reporting, and part opinion. Some of these essays were previously published in magazines and literary reviews. Put together in this anthology, they nicely sum up a life rich with experiences that range from turning a forest into a private nature reserve, through the folly of youthful alcoholic indulgence in the company of the lovely Miss Maine, to presenting Kurt Vonnegut and facing a classroom of severely disturbed children without previous preparation. Also here are Twaronite’s excellent reasons for not having children, his early experience with religion, and his highly amusing discussion over how to choose a god from the many available. He also tackles the troubling problems that arose after his wife’s accident, how they both coped, and he gives us the confidence to face the same situation when it arises.

But it is, no doubt, Twaronite’s open-minded and humorous treatment of life that delights us most. Some might not agree with his point of view, his conclusions, his musical taste, or his building choices, and there might very well be people who might not like where his questioning mind takes them. But no one can deny either his logic or the pleasure to be had from reading the words of someone who refuses to march with the crowd. Twaronite’s writing style is easy and unpretentious; his irreverence and ability to laugh at himself are a treat and I couldn’t help wishing I could meet him, sit down and spend the afternoon in his company.

Essay Published in Freethouht Today

An excerpt from my book My Life as a Sperm. Essays from the Absurd Side has just appeared in Freethought Today  https://www.freethoughttoday.com/vol-37-no-04-may-2020/gene-twaronite-a-helpful-guide-to-choosing-the-perfect-god

It is the only freethought newspaper published in the U.S.

Take care and be safe.

Virtual Book Fair

I will be participating in a Virtual Book Fair this Saturday, May 2, from 9AM EST to 6PM EST. I’ve never done one of these things before, but with in-person book festivals cancelled for the time being, I thought I’d give this a try. For all you book-loving shut-ins, this is a chance to check out some enjoyable reads, many by Amazon or NY Times best-selling authors. OK, so you can’t hug or shake hands, but you can interact with them via email, Facebook, Twitter, and other social media as well as purchase books if you choose. The event is free and you can participate by going here to register:   http://www.enjoyablebooks.com/book-fair
You can reach me at this email during the event. You can also email me a Zoom invitation for a face time book talk. I promise to check my emails regularly. Hope you can make it.
Take care and be well.

My Life as a Sperm Video

Like everyone else during these difficult times, authors need to find new ways of connecting with people. While public readings are out, I can at least send you a bit of laughter and tell you about my new book in this new YouTube video. Be safe and be well. https://youtu.be/po-__9bbUxU